Labor Day Birth Stories: Baby Girl #2

Note to my male readers (assuming I have any): this might be a good time to go read a blog about sports or politics or something. All you need to know is that we were expecting Baby #2, she came, she was healthy, and we lived happily every after.

Well, if you read my first story, you know that things didn't exactly go as planned during our first baby's birth. I ended up with just about every intervention you can imagine, short of a c-section. And we were thisclose to that.

Two and a half years later, it was time for Round 2. I felt more confident this time. I mean, I'd already given birth once, right? I knew how our hospital worked, I liked (and trusted) my doctor - this time I'd been able to see the same doctor almost every visit.

The baby was due October 2nd.I really liked this due date because both of my grandmas and my mom have birthdays in October. I thought the baby might even come on one grandma's birthday (October 3). Wouldn't that be neat?

However, Baby had her own ideas about when she would like her birthday. The night / morning of September 28 I woke up about 4 A.M and sat straight up in bed. Had I just heard a "pop"? And what was that wet sensation? Um, yeah, that would be amniotic fluid. Leaking. Just like all those dumb t.v. shows and movies where the woman's water breaks or she leans over and shakes her husband, "Honey, it's time."

Real labor isn't like that, of course. Except when it is.

I woke up Prince Charming and asked him what I should do. He suggested (logically) that I should call the hospital and ask them. But I didn't want to. They would just tell me to come in and I knew - from my experience with Polly - that the hospital wasn't where I wanted to be just yet. So I waited at home for a little while. The other consideration was that Little Polly was going to be staying with her Gram and Granddad while we went to the hospital for Baby Sister. And since they were already expecting her that morning, since I had a non-stress test and ultrasound scheduled for that day, maybe we could just wait and not call them in the wee sma's.

Between the irregular contractions and leaking fluid, I decided to call the hospital around 6:30 that morning. And, as predicted, they told me to come in. I think we ended up dropping Polly off at her grandparents' somewhere after 7.

We went straight to maternity triage where they gave me an ultrasound to be sure my water had actually broken. Which, um, yes it had. (Duh) Then they moved me to a labor / delivery room and hooked me up to the fetal monitor and all the other stuff (i.v., blood pressure cuff, etc.) My contractions weren't too bad but the baby didn't seem to tolerate them very well. Any time I moved her heart rate would go down and, as you know, that's not good. In order to keep her stable, I could only lay on my left side. Not the most comfortable way to labor, to say the least. Hence, the anesthesiologist was called and yes, I had an epidural. Again. And, once Baby seemed "happy", Pitocin. Again.

So I was more comfortable, the baby was more stable and things seemed to be moving along (no stalled labor this time). I rested, Prince Charming and I talked and I think I remember playing cards at one point but since I was still on my left side it was hard to hold the cards and I suspect he was cheating anyway (not really, but it makes a better story), that didn't last long.

Labor was progressing well but soon enough, Baby's numbers were dropping again. They turned me on my right side - small improvement. They started running water up toward the baby, which was new to me. That seemed to help Baby along, too, though I didn't think much of it at the time.

The afternoon passed quickly and soon, it was time to push. This part terrified me because I remembered how awful it had been with Polly. I hadn't been able to feel anything and it had lasted forever. Not so this time, the doctor and the nurse got everything ready, the doctor told Prince Charming to be ready (to cut the cord) and, despite my apprehension, I was able to feel the need to push and still experience some relief from the pain. Less than an hour later, at 6:39 p.m, Baby Tigger was born.

The doctor ended up cutting the cord as soon as Tigger's head emerged because it was wrapped around her little neck. Prince Charming was invited to do a ceremonial cut a few seconds later. We were both just so relieved to see her - they tossed her up on me (what is with the doctors and that "toss the baby" thing they do?) and I spoke to her and kissed her.

The doctor said I wouldn't have needed any stitches except for the fact that I tore where I had been stitched before (thanks to that traumatic labor with Polly). For whatever reason, they had me fixed up and ready before the nurses had even finished weighing Tigger.

"I need my baby," I told them. So Prince Charming brought her over to me. She nursed - almost immediately - like a champ and she didn't show any ill effects from her ordeal with the cord. That was the moment I decided that (controversial statement ahead!) I'll  most likely always choose to give birth in a hospital. Maybe some of the interventions are unnecessary, but I believe God had us in the right place with the right doctor in order to keep Tigger safe.

Also different from my first birth, I felt like a million bucks. I could walk almost immediately after the labor, I was starving and ate a huge meal, and I felt just generally terrific. A very nice way to end a very strange birth experience!

Lessons learned: 1.) Babies have their own ideas of when they should come and sharing a birth stone with their grandmas and great-grandmas might not figure into their calculations. 2.) Even a low-stress, no-complication, "easy" pregnancy might not translate into an easy or completely non-scary labor.

This post is linked to the Labor Day Link Up over at Amy's Finer Things.

Labor Day Birth Stories: Baby Girl #1

Our first baby was due at the end of December. Prince Charming and I had prepared a room for the baby and taken the labor classes offered at our hospital (mostly notable for completely grossing out Prince Charming. "It's going to be like that?"). In short, we (thought) were ready.

Not so much, as it turned out. One Wednesday night, two days before my due date, I sat in our church's children's program and counted contractions. At least, I thought they were contractions. I was uncomfortable. And nervous. One way or another I knew our baby was coming soon.

For those of you who are men reading this, you may wish to stop now. All you need to know: the baby came, perfectly healthy and beautiful, one day before her due date. The end. Come back and read my blog another time.

For the rest of you brave souls: Neither of us got much sleep that night and Thursday morning I called our hospital and was told to come on in. This, as it turns out, was probably a mistake. I was in labor, yes, but not very far along and it would have been better to struggle a bit longer at home. My mom walked with me a little bit while my dad took Prince Charming to get him some food.

At some point not long after this, the hospital staff (can't remember whether it was a nurse or doctor) checked me. Labor had stalled. Just then I was already very tired (hadn't slept the night before) and I let them talk me into starting Pitocin.

Does that make mistake #2 or 3? I can't remember at this point. The thing about "Pit" is, you're confined to your bed at that point (or at least I was). And everything hurts so much worse. Now, looking back, I'm pretty sure the hospital should have sent me home when I first came in. It was December 20 and maybe that influenced their decision to keep me.

Despite best intentions, the Pitocin sold me on the idea of an epidural. One of the nurses warned me that an epidural would probably slow down my labor but at that point I didn't care. They got the anesthesiologist and - blessed relief - the epidural kicked in immediately.

Prince Charming and I took a nap. Seriously. That is what we did. The monitoring didn't bother me. The automatic blood pressure checks didn't bother me. Nothing bothered me at that point!

Eventually we both woke up, nicely rested. Then we worked a crossword puzzle. True story.

The worst thing to me at this point was the fact that I couldn't have anything to eat. Prince Charming brought me ice chips and popsicles and he didn't eat in front of me but I was getting hungry.

As it was getting later in the afternoon, the doctor came in and suggested "we" break my water. I agreed. (I suppose once you've agreed to one intervention, you figure a few more won't hurt) At some point my nurse (a Christian whom I liked very much) had to transfer to another laboring woman who was closer to delivering than I. And I didn't like her replacement, which didn't help anything that happened later.

Breaking my water seemed to work because labor progressed very quickly after that. The only problem with that? My epidural had worn off. So I went from feeling Nothing to feeling The Worst Pain I've ever felt in my life. Not a pretty situation. Prince Charming insisted they get me more medicine. They warned us it would be harder to push. Seriously, this part is a haze in my mind but whatever happened, they gave me more drugs.

And then it was time to push. Which, as they had predicted, was rather difficult. Two and half hours worth of difficult. After that long they started consulting each other on what do next. I was exhausted and increasingly panicked that this was all going to end in a C-section.

"What do you think about trying the vacuum extractor?" My doctor finally suggested to me. (Have I mentioned that I give birth in a teaching hospital and the room was full of my doctor, her attending O.B, several med students and about four nurses?)

"Yes!" I'm pretty sure I nearly shouted. Round about this time, the nurses got Prince Charming a chair because he was looking rather faint. (He's not proud of it, of course, but that's what happened).

Lest you be confused, a vacuum extraction doesn't actually mean they suck the baby out of you. You still have to push, it just helps guide the head out.

And it worked quite well. Our Polly was born at 8:21 p.m. That's over 24 hours since my contractions had started (thought not all in active labor) and three hours of pushing.

And she was so worth it.

I will never forget how they threw that slippery little bundle (all 7 lbs. 11 ozs. of her) on my chest as soon as she was born. She was gunky and crying indignantly and absolutely perfect in my eyes. Then they took her and started doing some of the stuff they do to newborns (within my sight) while the doctors finished up with me. Yeah, I'm not really going to go into that part. I watched them, courtesy of the mirror on the ceiling and it's not really for the faint of heart.

But that didn't matter either because soon enough Prince Charming was carrying our bundle of baby back over to me. (Side note: for someone who had never held a newborn, he sure was possessive and confident with ours). Our hospital's policy is non-separation for mother and baby so were able to attempt nursing right away. (Polly wasn't much interested, probably because of the drugs that she got from labor, but it could also be because Polly is just not much interested in food in general.)

After a quiet hour of recovery, they moved us to our room. We went past all our waiting family (of which I mostly remember my baby brother - then 6 - calling my name and asking for me). Then, even though it was after visiting hours, everyone came in our room and met the baby, even my little brother. We had thought we might have to be sneaky about the Bear's presence because the hospital policy only allows children under age 14 if they are siblings of the baby, but no one ever asked us about the little blond boy sitting in my hospital bed with me, even though they knew Polly was my first baby. And no one has ever asked since, either, although my older girls had to get flu shots in order to see Baby Sweet Pea, but that's another birth story.

So that's pretty much it. It didn't happen at all the way I wanted it to. Recovery was hard (I couldn't even walk until the next day) and we all (Prince Charming, Polly & of course, yours truly) looked like we had been in a prize fight.

Still, there were things that went right too. Things like: having Polly with me at all times. Our hospital provides lactation consultants too, but I have to say I didn't find mine very helpful at all. Fortunately, other than her excessive sleepiness in her first few days, it wasn't all that hard to establish nursing with Polly. (Another side note: her pediatrician and the lactation consultant both thought Polly was "tongue tied" but we refused any intervention on that with no ill effects to nursing or her future speech habits. Actually, it's kind of funny to think of Polly being in ANY way "tongue tied" considering she can out talk just about anyone I know)

Lessons learned: 1. ) Stay home during labor as long as possible. 2.) Understand that interventions tend to have a cascading effect. 3. ) Ultimately, what's important is the beautiful baby in your arms, however she happened to get there.

This post is linked to The Labor Day Link Up over at Amy's Finer Things.

Books of 2010 - August

1. Guyland: The Perilous World Where Boys Become Men. Non-fiction by Michael Kimmel. This author is not a Conservative but his intellectual honesty was refreshing. Very sobering read. (And it kind of made me glad I'm raising girls instead of sons, until I realized those girls are going to be looking for men to marry one day. Yikes!)

2.Taking Care of the Me in Mommy: Becoming a Better Mom: Spirit, Body & Soul Non-fiction by Lisa Whelchel. Very encouraging and lots of great ideas here. Lisa (can I call her that?) seems like the kind of person I'd like to sit down and just chat with.

3.Love That Lasts: When Marriage Meets Grace. Non-fiction by Gary & Betsy Ricucci. I highly recommend this one. Highly. I think Emerson Eggerichs' book Love and Respect is my favorite book about marriage (after the Bible, of course) but this book runs a close second. This book emphasizes the importance of the local church in Christian marriages, which is an often over-looked aspect of marriage. I made Prince Charming move this to the top of his reading stack as soon as I finished it. I'd love for some couples in our church to do this as a small group study. Maybe next year...

4. A Tale of Two Cities. Fiction by Charles Dickens. It took me awhile to get into this one but once I did I found it very engrossing. Not as fun as The Scarlet Pimpernel but very moving.

5. Teaching Your Children Values. Non-fiction by Linda & Richard Eyre. I picked this up at the library sale this year. Nothing ground breaking here, and it's a bit dated at this point. (The book, not actually teaching our children values.)

6. The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict. Non-fiction by Ken Sande. You must read this book. Our small group will be doing the Ladies' Bible Study version starting in October because I was so impressed with the material. Very challenging stuff here.

7. For Queen and Country: Britain in the Victorian Age. Non-fiction by Margaret Drabble. I ordered this to read because Polly was studying Queen Victoria and I wanted to brush up. Some interesting things here but also a touch of condescension that I found off-putting. Written in 1978 so somewhat dated now. (Although you'd think a book about history would age a bit better)

8. The Contemplative Mom: Restoring Rich Relationship with God in the Midst of Motherhood. Non-fiction by Ann Kroeker. Yes, I read two books of this type in August (see #2 above). Between school starting back, the last trimester of pregnancy and life in general, I needed the reminders and encouragement. Of the two I probably preferred Whelchel's book but they are not at all the same and God used both of them to encourage me.

9. 50 Great Myths of Popular Psychology: Shattering Widespread Misconceptions about Human Behavior. Non-fiction by Lilienfeld, Lynn, Ruscio & Beyerstein. I picked this up on a whim at the library but it was a terrific read. Well foot-noted but not overly technical. Lots of food for thought here.

10. Corduroy Mansions. Fiction by Alexander McCall Smith. A new series, very similar to the 44 Scotland Street series only set in London instead of Edinburgh. Kind of fun but not anything to write home about.

11. George, Nicholas and Wilhelm: Three Royal Cousins and the Road to World War I. Non-fiction by Miranda Carter. Fascinating stuff for history buffs. (I suppose I consider myself one of that group) Well written and engaging, thorough but not exhaustive (considering how much source material must be waded through to write about even one of these men).

12. Bellfield Hall: Or, The Observations of Miss Dido Kent (Dido Kent Mysteries). Fiction by Anna Dean. A new mystery series. Miss Marple meets Jane Austen. Suited me quite well on a lazy afternoon.

Totals for August:
Fiction: 3, including 1 Dickens novel completed
Non-fiction: 9

(P.S. I'm trying some new Amazon links so please bear with me. Your mileage may vary with each of these books - YMMV, as they say.)