A Typical Homeschool Day?

We've met the students (5), we've shared our curriculum and general style (relaxed classical), we've shown where we homeschool (all over the house) and now it's time to describe a typical day.

Except, typical isn't real.

Typical is how things would go if every day was the same. "Normal" is an even harder mark to hit. Is there such a thing as a normal day?

Not really, not for us. (I mean, we just might go ride a sphynx for fun. You never know with us.)

But this is a rough sketch of a a how a day might go, if none of us had any other obligations

• Up between 7 and 8. We're not early risers. Unless Philip is subbing, we usually don't have a reason to be up before 7. This is wonderful thing about our homeschooling flexibility. If he gets up early, I might...or I might not. (See? Nothing typical.)
• The kids who are up earliest can fix their breakfast, if they're hungry. Or they could put on a DVD. They usually go for the DVD option. I have my quiet time (Bible reading, reading, waking up...) while they are occupied.
• Some of us eat breakfast together, but not everyone. And hot breakfast? Almost never happens. (Unless you count Oatmeal or Cream of Wheat.) Big breakfasts are served for supper around here, never in the A.M. 
• I unload the dishwasher & start a load of laundry while we're doing breakfast.
• "School" starts after breakfast. That could be 8:30. It could be 9:00. It could even be 9:30, depending on what else we're getting into. If it's a co-op day (Mondays), we'll have to be there by 9:15, so we won't do any work at home in the morning. If it's a day my niece is with us (Thursday & Friday), we'll probably start on the earlier side.
• We do memory work together: Scripture passage, section from Shakespeare, other poems. 
• Big girls start on independent work while I do things like calendar time, phonics, and math games with the younger two girls. The iBoy usually plays during this, but sometimes he's back in bed for a morning nap.
• Once things are done with the younger girls, I do Grammar and writing with Tigger. Miss Lili gets to play now, but Tigger & Sweet Pea usually have narration, grammar, or other things of that sort to do with me.
• History and Science are divided up. Three days are History days and two days are Science days, for Tigger & Sweet Pea (of course reading & special projects could be any day of the week). Polly is working mostly independently and she does Science 5 days a week. Miss Lili tags along on Science when she wants to. (The last two weeks we were studying leaves and she was right there with us.) We might do this right after memory work, or it might get pushed until right before lunch. So far (4 weeks of school almost done), it hasn't ever been skipped. I'm just not uptight about when in the morning it happens.
• Latin - primarily for the oldest two, but the younger two have been known to hang around, usually happens before lunch. Sometimes we save it until after lunch, when the youngest two will be in bed so we'll have fewer interruptions.
• Lunch is around noon.
• We do a quick pick-up of whatever we got out in the morning. (I say this is typical, but it doesn't always happen. Life is better when it does.) Laundry gets switched. We start planning supper, if we didn't already do that.
• Naptime is around 12:30 or 1:00. This is for everyone: the older kids are allowed to read or work independently on schoolwork, but the younger ones have to be in bed. They can listen to a book on CD, or look at books, but they have to be in bed with no toys. (This is particularly important on the days my niece is with us. And then once a week my nephew is here too, after his morning kindergarten. He doesn't sleep but he does rest quietly and listen to a CD with the girls.)
• After nap (1 hour, unless someone falls asleep, in which case: DO NOT DISTURB.), there might be more school, but usually it's done and the kids can play. I try to encourage them to go outside at this point, but if it's too hot or raining, or there are too many bugs, or someone has a hangnail or something (seriously. The reasons not to go outside can become rather ridiculous at times), they can play inside. Emphasis on play: no screens. (Although Miss Lili pushes this rule nearly every day. That's typical, too.)

Some days we go to the grandparents. Sometimes there are errands to run. With five children, almost every week someone has a doctor or dentist appointment. (OK, that might be a slight exaggeration, but not much. In August alone we had two dental appointments and one check-up.)

My primary goal in our homeschool day is to get as much done as possible before lunch, in the limited time between 9 and 12. Those three hours are golden. As long as we keep moving in those hours, we'll feel accomplished by the end of the day.

Supper is usually around 5:30 or 6:00. It can be later or earlier depending on what Philip's schedule looks like. We do our family devotion (a short reading) and our "Questions" (what my kids call our Baptist catechism) most evenings. Honestly, some days we don't even do those. (Wednesdays are particularly difficult during the school year since we need to leave our house early to get our church's kids program set up.)

After supper is clean up the dining room and then free time, or finish up what ever school work you procrastinated on time, or watch a family movie, or - and this is probably the most typical in our house - game time. Philip almost always has a game to play with the older kids. One of the kids will take a turn playing Minecraft or some other computer game. I might read or work on a project or even play the game with the others (although I'm not sure I'd call that typical).

Bedtime starts around 8 or 8:30. This includes reading aloud. (Usually Philip reads a picture book - or 3 - to the youngest and I read a chapter to the oldest) The older girls are allowed to read for another thirty minutes or an hour.

Philip and I do a coin toss for the computer. (OK, not really. I was just checking to see if you were still reading.) We work on projects (games, blog, other writing) for a bit and then many evenings we'll watch something on DVD or off of the computer before heading upstairs to - you'll never guess - read some more. Many evenings I go up to read while Philip works a little more.

So, typical? Maybe not. But the days do seem to have a rhythm that works for us.

Do you follow a strict schedule or do your days have an informal rhythm? Do you have a typical day?
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Candid Answers: How Long Does it Take to Homeschool?

One question most people ask when they find out we homeschool is, "How long does that take?"

There are two answers for that:

1. Not long.

2. All the time.

Yes, I know. Those contradict. But they're both true and here are some reasons why:

1. Not long:

• In my philosophy of education, lessons should be short. I do not consider myself a "Charlotte Mason" homeschooler, but that was also one of her theories and I'm happy she agrees with me. (I kid, I kid.)
• We have almost zero lecture time. We have reading aloud, some worksheets, and lots of other things in a day, but very few lectures.
• I believe in teaching until a child masters a subject, but I don't believe in overdoing daily lessons. No subject can be truly learned or deeply loved in one day.
• We're not afraid of "drill". Repetition of math facts, key dates, beloved poems...these are all good things. We go over them and then move on. Drill does not have to mean "kill". Keep it short and sweet and the kids may not even realize that's what happened.
• Know your child(ren) well enough to challenge them, but not exasperate. Do not overwhelm a young reader with ten books that need to be read by the end of the week. Do not assign so many pages of Math your child despairs of finishing.
• Cut worksheets, skip ahead, repeat an old lesson - homeschooling works for the homeschool family, not the other way around. I saw a homeschool mom post recently that she loves Saxon Math because they do the first side together and then the child does the other side later, so she knows what the child understands. I'm glad that works for them, but we have never - not ever - in 8 years of "formal" homeschooling done that. (Please don't report me to the Saxon publishers.) Curriculum is made for the homeschooler, not the homeschooler for the curriculum. YOU ARE THE BOSS OF YOU (and your homeschool).
• No need for a strict schedule (unless you like one and find it useful). No need to call daily necessities of life "interruptions". It's just life.
• There's no time wasted in lining up, walking in a single-file row to the next class, getting things out of your locker before the next class (OK, yes, I admit, we love our lockers. But the time it takes to get going on the next subject is nil.)
• The kids don't ask permission to go to the bathroom. No announcements from the office interrupt us, and there are very few fire drills or assemblies. (I won't say there aren't any. After all, my kids need to know how to escape our house in case of fire, too.)
• Travel time: infinitesimal. Walk to another part of the house. Go outside from inside, or inside from outside. No busses. No car-pool. No pick-up, no drop-off, no finding rain gear or snow gear just to get to school.
• No hours of homework, once home from school. (My frank opinion: if you're spending two or more hours on homework a night per child, you are homeschooling.)

2. All the time:

• Learning happens everywhere, all day long, no matter what's on the schedule.
• Reading aloud is never finished. There's always something else to read. Board books to babies, picture books to preschoolers, stories to a school age child, deeper reading with an older child. A young reader can feel proud of her effort to read to her younger sister. The younger sister might narrate a board book (she'll call it "reading") to her baby brother.
• There's always a craft project, science experiment, art masterpiece, Lego world, or board game starting, in progress, or being finished. The house is almost never completely clean, with everything stowed away. 
• Depending on the day's events, we might be finishing a worksheet at 7 PM. That doesn't mean we were doing worksheets from 7 AM to 7 PM, that's just when that when happened to be finished. We might save a favorite read-aloud until bedtime. We might do an involved Science experiment during the baby's naptime. A field trip might (and, in fact, often does) occur on a Saturday.
• One industrious child might start on a few assignments before anyone else is up. I'm not saying it happens every day, but it does happen. 
• A child finished early, might be assigned to help another child with something. This is not a punishment for finishing, this is just one family member helping another. Older children can listen to narrations from the younger, they can help review math facts (sneaky - the older child is reviewing at the same time), they could put on an educational DVD (yes - it could happen).
• You might listen to a necessary book on CD while driving around town. Or you might conjugate some Latin or see who can remember the most poems or Bible verses. (Yes, we've done this.)
• All family vacations have some component that counts as "educational" or a field trip. Even a trip to see family.

Learning is integrated with life - the two are inseparable and we wouldn't have it any other way. 

Check back later this week for a post about "Our Typical Homeschool Day" (spoiler alert: there's really no such thing as a typical day.)
(P.S: If you're looking to get your schedule under control, or your house in shape, or your life just generally back on track don't miss this:

This course is 30% off until September 2nd using the code backtoschool)

If you have a question you'd like me to attempt to answer, you can email me at candiddiversions @ yahoo . com - just remove spaces.
This post may contain affiliate links. See Disclosure page for more about that.
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Mom's Education Matters Too: What I'm Excited to Learn in 2014-15

OK, so you've met my "students" and our class pet: Meet the Students.
You've seen some of the places & spaces where we "do" school: Living and Learning Together.
And you've looked over our list of curriculum and textbooks for the kids: Curriculum 2014-15. (Little homeschool mom secret: I want to learn a lot of the things I've chosen for my kids. Their books are so cool. And who knows? Maybe Algebra is better the second time around. I've heard rumors to that effect.)

But it probably won't surprise you to know there are a few things I'd like to learn this year, too. Here they are in no particular order:

1. How to make blogging more than just a hobby.

Steps I've taken in this area so far: joined a Google Plus community for blog improvement and encouragement; added a few more affiliates (you can find these in my right sidebar) and started researching others; printed off some blog planners and lists; started a Pinterest board on this subject; WRITE EVERYDAY. Well, I already did write every day. But now I'm trying to write something blog related every day, even if it's just a rough draft or a list of ideas.

2. What is needed to do necessary schoolwork every day, add some babysitting, keep the house in relatively good order, keep up with laundry, meals, etc. and still have time left for my own goals. 

Steps I've taken in this area so far: more lists. Lists for the older girls. Lists for myself. Discipline to do at least one load of laundry every day, run the dishwasher every day, and so. Good news: it's going well so far. And my goals {blogging, fiction writing, etc.} are on my list too.

3. What it's like to meet with other homeschool families on a regular basis.

Steps I've taken so far: joined a homeschool co-op. Our first co-op day isn't until September, but we're signed-up, paid up, and excited. (OK, certain of us are more excited than others...) The classes I signed the kids up for are all enrichment (phys ed, art, a hands-on science lab) instead of things we absolutely have to have.

One reason for that is I already had our curriculum picked out and purchased before I knew we were going to do co-op. I didn't want to buy any more curriculum or overburden my kids with too many challenging classes. I want co-op days to be days they're excited about (also, co-op is on a Monday. No one needs too much challenge on a Monday morning, right? Least of all me.)

4. What's the best way for us to make a meal plan every week.

This is kind of related to #2. I'm incredibly blessed that my husband loves to cook. I can cook, but I don't love it the way he does. What that means is we both cook meals throughout the week, but we need to have better communication about who is cooking what, when, and which ingredients they'll be using. Because I do not like going to the pantry only to find one of my necessary ingredients was used up last Monday. (Side goal: gently reminding other family members to list depleted ingredients on the grocery list. Also related: convincing children not to put empty packages BACK IN THE PANTRY.)

Steps taken so far: yes, another list. And talking about what we both want to fix, based on the sale papers BEFORE I go to the store. (Because my husband likes to cook but he does not do the grocery shopping.)

5. What I want to learn next, in whatever books grab my attention. (I'm a "Knowledge Collector", remember?)

For several weeks this summer I was mostly reading about the First World War. That made for fascinating reading but it also burned me out a little bit. I still had a stack of reading, including some books that had been in my stack all summer, but I just wasn't motivated to read them any longer. So yesterday I returned all but a couple of books in my stack.

Which means I'm looking for more books that demand to be read. I'm particularly looking for non-fiction that is NOT war related.

Because, even though I started very young (see above picture) there are still so many things I want to learn.

So, do you have any suggestions for my "must read" stack? And what are you hoping to learn this year?
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"Not" Back to School 2014: Meet The Students

We call our method of homeschooling, "Relaxed Classical". (See our curriculum here: Curriculum 2014-15) Now it's time to meet our "students":

This is "Polly".

• Age: will be 13 in December
• Grade level: mostly 8th grade 
• Favorite Subject: History
• Least Favorite Subject: Math
• Mad Skills in: Reading
• Looking forward to: Science studies and experiments
• Strengths: strong independent learner, self-starter, good memory, management capability
• Weaknesses: perfectionism, procrastination, still working on improving handwriting (has greatly improved since last year but wants to keep at it), bossiness
• You can find her: reading a book, volunteering at the library, programming on a laptop, building elaborate Lego or Playmobil worlds, inventing board games

This is "Tigger"

• Age: will be 10 in September
• Grade level: mostly 5th grade
• Favorite Subject: Science
• Least Favorite Subject: Math
• Mad skills in: Handwriting
• Looking forward to: studying more Botany
• Strengths: good memory, creative, imaginative writing, entertaining the little folks, keeping herself busy
• Weaknesses: easily distracted, hates change, can't be hurried, stirs up her younger siblings, avoids chores
• You can find her: writing a poem, reading aloud to her siblings, playing games with Sweet Pea, reading a book, inventing elaborate play scenarios

This is "Sweet Pea"

• Age: 7
• Grade level: Mostly 2nd 
• Favorite Subject: Science
• Least Favorite Subject: Math
• Mad Skills in: Art
• Looking forward to: starting Taekwondo
• Strengths: creativity, peacemaking, generally cheerful, unique perspective on just about everything, 
• Weaknesses: untidy, forgetful, constant movement, needs a sister or two to play
• You can find her: drawing, painting, coloring, tracing, playing a game with Tigger, playing toys with Miss Lili, building elaborate Minecraft houses, playing outside

This is "Miss Lili"

• Age: will be 4 in September
• Grade level: preschool
• Favorite Subject: coloring
• Least Favorite Subject: not doing "school"
• Mad Skills in: playing
• Looking forward to: classes with other 4 year olds at co-op
• Strengths: great memory, helpful, generally cheerful, inquisitive, playing alone, singing, computer skills
• Weaknesses: bossiness, strong-willed, interrupting, leaves disasters and doesn't clean them up (without being warned and /or helped) 
• You can find her: on the computer, singing and/or playing Frozen, playing toys in her room, bossing her sisters around, playing outside, working puzzles, asking questions, drawing on the white board

This is the "iBoy"

• Age: will be 16 months old September 1.
• Grade level: baby.
• Favorite Subject: lunch.
• Least Favorite Subject: naptime.
• Mad Skills in: getting things out.
• Looking forward to: chasing his sisters, once he really gets this walking thing figured out
• Strengths: independent, curious, makes us laugh, fairly even-tempered, extreme adorability
• Weaknesses: stubborn, tends to laziness, somewhat picky eater, doesn't say much yet
• You can find him: taking books and toys off of shelves, exploring, chasing the cat, eating, getting into places and things where he doesn't belong, pulling up shirts so he can find people's bellies (this, to him, is hilarious), making people happy

Class pet:

Sammy Kitty

• Age: unknown
• Grade level: she does what she wants
• Favorite Subject: recess
• Least Favorite Subject: anything noisy
• Mad Skills in: balancing on narrow things
• Looking Forward to: the next time the family eats outside and the iBoy drops his food
• Strengths: gentle with children, catching mice, hiding
• Weaknesses: kind of obsessed with food, needs constant attention from any adult outside
• You can find her: she finds you

Have you homeschooled multiple children at once? What are your best tips?

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Throwback Thursday: Organizing our Homeschool

Throwback Thursday is a chance to bring an old post to light.

This week: Our New School System from August 11, 2010.

What I Like About This Post: This method helped solve several of our homeschool problems. At the time workboxes were all the rage and I felt completely left out since we lived in a small house and didn't have the space for each child to have workboxes.

I shared the post because I hoped it would help other homeschool families think outside the box. (Um, that's a pun, I guess. Sorry.)

What I'd Change About it Now: Well, I'd title it differently. And I'd include affiliate links since that post has proven to be popular over the years and every little bit of Amazon Affiliate money helps. So I made those changes today to share this post again and update it for our Pinterest times. (So weird to think that we didn't have Pinterest in 2010!)

Here's the new graphic I made (this is also a link to the original post, if you'd like to click on over)

Now that we're settled in our new, larger house, we no longer use these folders in quite the same way, but it worked very well for several years. (To see our school set up now see: Living and Learning Together.)

If you have an older post you'd like to share, please leave a link in the comments. I'd love to give these older posts a new chance.

Living and Learning Together: Our Family Room, School Room, & Office

Now, every homeschool family knows that "school" doesn't just happen in one room. There's the kitchen for science experiments, the dining room table, the comfiest couch for reading aloud, a bedroom rug (comfier for those who like to spread out their work), outside for exploring, gardening, building forts...I could go on.

Learning isn't confined to a school room. (See my post from last year, when we were living in a rental: Homeschooling Without Borders.)

I know all those things, and yet, for the first time in our family's life, we have a dedicated space for most of our school items. This is a great blessing, even if we don't "do" all our school here (whatever that means).

This is a finished basement space in our split-level house. It has to serve as our home office (Philip and I both work from home), our family room for watching movies or playing Playmobil (in fact, it may be more accurate to call this our Playmobil Room), and for housing most, if not all, of our school supplies.

This curtain wire from IKEA helps display some of the copious amount of artwork our daughters produce. (See the white board easel? That's another IKEA find and you never know what you might see there...)

We finally have a nice big space for a bulletin board - currently displaying a U.S map, a number line, and our pocket charts for flash cards. (Sweet Pea's sight words go on the red one, Polly and Tigger's Latin cards go on the blue)

I still love our IKEA Expedit for holding anything you can think of: school books, Philip's games (sometimes this place looks like a game store), games for the girls, scrapbooks, records, and yes, more Playmobil. (The plane and cars usually live up here to keep them away from the iBoy's reach. iBoy = Godzilla, as far as Playmobil world is concerned.)

Then we have these lockers. I found them on Craigslist and bought them for $20 from a guy demolishing a warehouse. I have plans to refinish them, but I kind of love them the way they are. We'll see which one of my impulses wins out.

Right now each girl has her own locker and I have two for my teacher's guides and some manipulatives. There are alphabet magnets on one side and more art displayed on both sides. Markers and some science equipment are on top, out of reach of the younger two.

We also keep all our craft supplies here. See the sewing machine there? It's theoretically more accessible there but that theory has yet to be tested since I haven't sewn a stitch since we've lived here.

This shelf (to the right of the TV in the first picture) holds a lot of our favorite read alouds, along with board and foam puzzles for the iBoy. Right now, he dumps the pieces. But soon enough he'll learn to put them together.

The girls also have this desk (Polly did the painting herself!) in their room so someone can work away from the crowd, if necessary.

And then there are the educational items elsewhere around the house, like these art books:

Which we keep on this shelf in our living room:

To see how we built this, check out my post: From Bannister to Built-Ins. (The picture above is from that post.)

I've shown you all that, but the truth is you can usually find us at our dining room table for book work. Some things, no matter how much space you have, never change.

Where do you "do" school? How do you organize all your homeschool materials?
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"Not" Back to School Curriculum 2014-2015

What you can see in this picture:

• We love Peace Hill Press
• We adore Apologia Science
• We believe in Saxon Math

Those are some mainstays of our curriculum choices. To see which specific books we're using this year, read on:

11 Tips for Homeschooling Without Breaking the Budget

We're a family of 7 living on a tight budget - but homeschooling doesn't break that budget. Here's how:

Don't just shop educational stores or homeschool catalogs - keep your eyes open because educational items are everywhere. I found our favorite solar system magnets at Hobby Lobby on clearance. The Target dollar bins have supplied flashcards, posters, magnets, and more over the years. And don't forget to ask for discounts. Some bookstores and education stores will give you a teacher discount if you're a homeschool family (you may have to provide documentation). If you do your shopping at a homeschool convention, try to buy from a vendor that price matches. I save at least $50 every year by doing so.

Yard Sales and Thrift Stores - 'tis the season for yard sales (or garage sales or tag sales, depending on what they're called in your area). Things I've found at yard sales and thrift stores include white boards, chalk boards, bulletin boards, folders, unused curriculum, reference books, calendars (which make great art books), maps, flashcards, games, measuring cups and spoons, play money, Lincoln logs, Legos, Tinker Toys, shells, puzzles, educational toys and baskets to organize everything. Don't forget used curriculum sales, online or otherwise.

Back to School Sales - oh, how I love these. Watch the ads (and keep them, if you have a store that price matches) and you can pick up notebooks, filler paper, printer paper, notecards, folders, markers, crayons, rulers, highlighters and more for pennies. Keep a stash of these items and dole them out as needed through the year. If you want to be truly frugal, do NOT let your children have unfettered access. My kids can go through a ream of paper faster than you can say "that was for printing maps for geography."

Gifts from family and friends - things that make good gifts include art supplies, craft kits, science equipment (my parents gave my kids a very nice microscope), Legos, puzzles, movies, and games. When grandparents or Aunts & Uncles ask for suggestions, don't forget these things.

Hand Me Downs - we've had friends and family pass down books, math manipulatives, science equipment, and more. When people know you're homeschoolers, they might offer you educational things they don't want any more. Accept with a smile. If you can't use it, pass it on to someone else (or donate it). Don't forget about the Craiglist "free" listings. Most of it won't interest you but you never know when someone might want to get rid of something you can actually use.

The Library - this should be a homeschool family's best friend. Most libraries in the US have more than just books these days. There are movies, CDs, audio books, magazines (including technical journals), items available for downloading (ours has ebooks, free music downloads, magazines, and newspapers), and that's not to mention the programs they put on. (So far this year my girls have made marble mine shafts, attending a program on Water - more fun than it sounds!- Fun with Bubbles, and more.)

Don't forget to ask if there's a teacher card option. Homeschool Moms should be eligible (with some documentation) for this and it is so worth it. (Ours means the books are automatically renewed and there are no fees. It can only be used for our school items, not movies or the books for me, but still, that's a big savings for a family with hundreds of items checked out.)

Free downloads and printables - there are entire websites and blogs dedicated to these. Some of my favorites are:

• Free Homeschool Deals
• Homeschool Share
• Donna Young

Rotate memberships - you don't have to buy memberships to every museum, zoo, and aquarium near you. Pick one a year (this year the zoo, next year the science museum or something like that). Watch for free or discount days at your favorite spots, if you don't have a membership. Museum or zoo memberships also make great gifts.

Local parks - playgrounds, hiking trails, educational programs, concerts...you don't know what's available until you check. Take a walk on the same hiking trail once a week and have your children note the differences or keep a nature journal.

Barter - trade piano lessons for art class or babysit for Spanish lessons. Swap your 5th grade math for a friend's 6th grade Science. There are facebook groups, co-ops and more for this but you can also try just asking friends you know.

Prioritize - in our family we buy Children's Theatre season tickets and Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra school concert tickets. Those experiences are important to us. But another family might find sports more important and pay fees for baseball in the summer and basketball in the winter. All of those are good things, but if you can't afford them all, know what your family wants and pursue that. There is no law that every five year old has to stand on a soccer field, especially if that five year old would rather be painting. It's not just a question of budgeting your money, but also your time. There are many great experiences and classes. But a family of more than one child cannot possibly do them all. Don't feel guilty about that.

A tight budget might be a challenge, but it's not an insurmountable one.

How do you stretch your homeschool budget?

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Picture credit: Pixabay

Mom's Education - Notes from the GHC: Perfectionist Children

While sorting out our next homeschool year, I found notes from a convention session that I haven't shared with you yet: Helping Perfectionistic Kids by Kathy Koch.

This session was held in an absolutely packed ballroom. I suspect perfectionism is a common problem in our homeschools. I won't try to reproduce the handout Dr. Koch supplied, you'll need to attend one of her sessions or read one of her books for that. I'm just going to share a few of the points that really jumped out at me.

• God is a strategic and intentional God. He designed our children. 
• See the talent to develop, not the problem to eliminate.
• A child is not a project to finish or a problem to solve.
• Affirm effort & accomplishment. 
• Talk about character.
• Perfectionism comes when expectations are higher than the child is prepared to risk.

Dr. Koch pointed out that perfectionist kids come from perfectionist parents and there was much nodding and assenting in the room. Here were her four antidotes for "The Perfection Infection":

1. Compassion - for the child, for yourself
2. Love - pause first, ponder the situation, then proceed
3. Acceptance - resist the urge to compare the child to anyone else, especially the child you imagined you would have
4. Perception - think, engage, listen, & wait. Parents rush in too often.

I appreciated the samples of what a parent can say in certain situations, things like

• "That was an honest effort." or "Good attempt."
• "Don't panic, it's new." (I'm definitely using this one with my perfectionist children. They look in a textbook we haven't done yet and despair that it's too hard, before we've done anything.)
• When a child says, "I can't," a parent should respond with "What can you do?"
• When a child says, "It's too hard," a parent can respond with, "How can I help?"

The idea is that we're equipping them to handle the difficulties that arise. Dr. Koch gave every parent permission (not that we needed it, but you know what I mean) to walk away from whiners, meltdowns, and manipulation from our kids.

I heard this repeated by Susan Wise Bauer: walk away from the meltdowns. When the child is overwrought and you're frazzled is not the time to fix things. Eat, sleep, take a shower, or whatever needs to happen and then address the problem when you're both calmer. I'm guessing I heard this advice repeated at the GHC because I'm going to need it this year, if only for myself.

Dr. Kathy Koch is a plain speaking, direct, effective communicator. She is not necessarily a homeschool advocate and she speaks in public schools and other settings as well. Do I agree with everything she says or writes? Probably not. But I highly recommend you attend at least one of her seminars if you get a chance. You can find out more about her at Celebrate Kids. 

Are you raising a perfectionist? What are your strategies for helping a perfectionist child?

Summer Homeschool Mom vs. Reality

Summer Homeschool Mom

First posted: July 17, 2013

Excerpt:
Summer Homeschool Mom attends conventions and pores over the Rainbow Resource Catalog. She compares prices at eBay, Amazon, CBD, and whatever other online classified sites she knows.

Summer Homeschool Mom cracks open The Well Trained Mind again. She reads blogs and pins ideas and downloads free unit studies and coloring sheets and planner pages.

Summer Homeschool Mom loves planners. She has at least three or four types printed and neatly plotted.

Summer Homeschool Mom thinks getting an early start sounds like a good idea. She imagines days where she wakes, showers, prays, eats, reads, and prepares for the day long before her children are up...

Every Summer I face the same struggle: finishing out an old school year and planning the new one. My idealism and my realism clash in a major battle of wills.

This year we're not facing a move or a new baby. We're planning what will be one of our first "normal" school years in a long time. (Whatever normal means, of course.) We'll have three school age children (roughly corresponding to 8th Grade, 5th Grade, & 2nd Grade levels) and two below school age (a soon to be 4 year old who wants to be involved in our school day and a 1 year old who wants to be into everything).

I find my idealistic self really rising up this year. I've considered multiple co-ops, support groups, and online classes. I've bought my curriculum and started my plans, even though it's still June and we haven't finished everything I had planned for last year.

I'm thinking about what doesn't work, and what might work and what I wish, in an ideal world, would work, even though it hasn't yet. We finally have a place for keeping most of our supplies accessible, a luxury we've almost never had in our homeschool.

I've described our style as "Relaxed Classical" in the past. In the "just getting by" months of last year (2 big moves, a new baby, etc.) we slimmed our school day down to the minimum (Phonics, Reading, Writing, Math, History) but now I'd like to add in those things that we didn't have time or energy to complete (Shakespeare, Latin, more time with Science, etc.)

Summer Homeschool Mom has many admirable qualities, and this year I'm trying to work with her strengths, while not letting her idealism run away with me. It's a time for really focusing on what is a priority in our family (loving learning, strong reading skills, systematic math) and what isn't (many electives are great ideas in theory but less practical when I consider how many children we have and other obligations).

So, I'm trying to keep the exhortation from the Great Homeschool Convention Classical Panel, about not making it too hard. And I want to make sure I'm not just ignoring the needs of our soon to be 4 year old, who loves learning and creating right along with us.

Tell me, fellow homeschool moms, how do you deal with your inner planner / idealistic self?

Linking up with:

5 Reasons I Love Peace Hill Press

We use books from Peace Hill Press for these subjects:

• Phonics instruction: The Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading
• Writing instruction: Writing with Ease and Writing with Skill
• Grammar: First Language Lessons
• History: The Story of the World

We've used the History, Grammar, and Phonics books throughout our homeschool years, starting with our oldest. This year we added the writing curriculum after trying other things that just weren't working.

Now, this is not a sponsored post or an affiliate post. I'm not affiliated with Peace Hill Press in any way. But I love these books and here are a few reasons why:

1. Many of the books are designed for multiple uses. Homeschool families are allowed to copy the activity pages for their students. Non-consumable means not having to buy new workbooks for each child. Saving money makes me happy. (The Grammar books are an exception to this. The teacher's guide can be used over again but you will need to purchase new student books for each child.)

They also facilitate use by multiple ages at once. We do History together, but my oldest has extra reading, assignments, & so on in order to go deeper into the material, while my younger students focus on the chapter, map work, & coloring pages. I had three school age students this year, ranging from seventh grade work to first grade. Anything where we could work together was a time saver for me.

2. The quality is excellent. These are not photo-copied in someone's basement workshop. We've used the History books for nearly two complete four year cycles now. They are holding up well despite enthusiastic use by my History loving students. There are also online resources and special things that can be added on. (We particularly enjoy The Story of the World cds as read by Jim Weiss.)

3. These follow the classical model, as laid out by Susan Wise Bauer in her book The Well Trained Mind. This method just makes sense to me. Four year cycles to get through all of History may sound daunting but The Story of the World makes it possible.

4. If you follow PHP on Facebook, you get information about upcoming products or seminars and a good dose of humor. I'm not sure who does their social media, but he or she has a well developed sense of humor. And who couldn't use a little more fun in their homeschool day, right?

5. Susan Wise Bauer is brilliant. Do I agree with her on every subject? No, of course not. I suspect particularly on matters of faith, we might have to agree to disagree. But on education, writing, preparing a student for college, and so on, I enjoy learning from her experience. She is a fantastic communicator.

You can find more of my favorite homeschool books in my Amazon store (this is an affiliate link, see Disclosure page for more about this).

Do you have a favorite curriculum? What do you love about it?
Linking up with:

Used Curriculum Sale

One thing homeschoolers have is lots of books. Some things you use and no longer need and some things come highly recommended but just don't quite fit your family. In an effort to clear some shelves, here are some things I'm ready to pass on. These are lightly used items (I'll specify more about their condition below).

Fine print:

• I am willing to ship to the lower 48 states only
• all prices include media mail shipping
• please contact me with this email if you are interested: candiddiversions @ yahoo . com (remove spaces)
• list the item or items in the subject line of your email
• first come, first served
• I accept paypal, I'll email you that information if you claim an item 
• prices may be negotiable, depending on shipping. Just ask!
• if you're local (Cincinnati area) I am willing to negotiate on shipping or delivery

General:

Fantastic, literature based curriculum for littles. Light shelf wear but overall in great condition.
*Sold*

Two third grade books for review or fun. Noticeable shelf wear. Comprehensive Curriculum of Basic Skills may have some writing inside (I noticed 3-4 pages with writing out of 450+ pages).

Grammar:

Highly recommended writing curriculum. This includes Levels 3 and 4. Both in great condition, no writing inside. *sold*

Two books to supplement your grammar curriculum of choice. No writing inside. How to Write a Paragraph is designed for grades 1-3, Grammar in Practice is for older students.

Science:

This is the book recommended by The Well Trained Mind for Physics in the elementary years (Grammar years), 1985 edition. Name written inside front cover but otherwise great condition.
*sold*

Foreign Language:

This the the teacher's manual and CD. Light wear, possibly some written notes (made by me while we used it) inside.

I'm linking up with:

Happy Shopping!